HomeAging With MonicaMonica's Beauty JournalPerfect skin goals are unattainable stop wasting money

Perfect skin goals are unattainable stop wasting money

For many years of my life, I tried to achieve clear, even-toned blemish free skin. I never succeeded. Then one day I decided to just stop trying to achieve the skin I’m told is the ideal skin to have, and learn to love and take care of the skin I do have.

When I find myself becoming preoccupied with my appearance, I try to remind myself that there are plenty of people in the world who would be glad to trade places with me. There are people in the world who would love to have nothing more to worry about than concern that their skin is not perfectly smooth and perfectly clear with no acne or acne related and other cosmetic issues. But their life’s crises are so significantly more serious, they just don’t have space to worry about not having perfect skin.

I also try to remind myself that there are people out there who love and celebrate themselves while having skin issues that are pretty major by comparison to things like waking up with pimples, and having to live with the blemishes left behind after the pimples are gone. Or discovering a new set of lines and wrinkles, or having under eye bags and circles, or nasolabial folds and such.

Don’t get me wrong. I’d rather not have bags under my eyes and for sure I’d rather not have nasolabial folds, and on those mornings when I wake up with an extra puffy face where the bags are just enormous and the folds are super pronounced on top of the bags being quadrupled in prominence, I have to work much harder at not feeling bad about myself.

It can be hard to live in this image-obsessed world. One way or another, people will make you feel self conscious. Whether it’s by making you feel less worthy and less beautiful by the way they sing the praises of other people because those other people are, in their opinion, perfect in some way–or they are pointing out your so-called flaws to you all the time–people can make it hard for you to love yourself.

But there is an amazing amount of power that comes from refusing to accept this idea that you are flawed if you’re not physically “perfect”. And also from rejecting the notion that you should be investing an inordinate amount of time and energy every day and spending hundreds to thousands of dollars every month trying fix your imperfections.

Taking care of your skin should obviously be part of the process of taking care of yourself. But the purpose for your skincare efforts should, ideally, be tied to your overall personal health and wellness goals and have nothing to do with wanting to fit some image of the perfect looking human. The only reason it should matter to you how you look, is because of the impact of how you look on your physical, mental and emotional well-being–not because of what anybody else thinks about you (good or bad) based on your appearance.

The turmeric powder kale powder beet powder potato apple cider vinegar face mask for not so perfect skin

not so perfect skinkale powder turmeric powder beet powder potatoe apple cider vinegar face mask treatment

Like I said, I’m not a model of perfect skin. No one reaches the age of 50 and manages to have perfect skin. It’s just not possible. Don’t ever believe the claims no matter who the person and how they look. Even if they are 20 years old, no one has perfect skin. And the older you get, the more aged your skin. That’s called life. It’s called science. It’s not a fault. It’s not a flaw. It’s not something you’re doing wrong or more to the point failing to do right. It’s nature doing it’s job. All you can do is try to do the best you can for the skin you’ve got whatever its condition. Your skin is going to go through stuff every day through the course of your life. Don’t hate on it. Just try to take the best care of it you can.

For the mask:


  • 1 – 2 tbsp Kale powder
  • 2 – 3 tbsp Turmeric powder
  • 1 tbsp Beet powder
  • 2 tbsp Grated fresh potato
  • 1 tsp apple cider vinegar
  • Water

(These measurements are just based on what I use. I generally have more left over so you might need less than the amounts indicated. Basically you’re trying to have enough to cover your face and neck. The only thing you want is to be sure to use twice as much turmeric powder as kale powder, and less beet powder than the kale powder)


Mix together in a bowl the kale powder, turmeric powder, beet powder, finely grated white potato, and apple cider vinegar with enough water to make a paste but not enough to make it runny. It needs to be a consistency that will stay on your face.

Apply to face and neck and leave on until the apple cider begins to generate a sort of minty feeling on your skin ( or until your mind tells you that you’ve kept it on long enough in case you never sense that minty feeling). Wash it off.

Note: the turmeric might stain your face yellow or the beet red. Use a wet cloth and gently wipe off the discoloration.

Disclaimer: Please know your skin and what does and does not agree with it. Please only try this mask if you know your skin can tolerate the named items. I am no skincare expert. This is a mask that I’ve concocted and used on my own face. I find that it brightens and rejuvenates my skin. I do not promise it will do anything specific to yours.

If you do happen to try this face mask treatment, please feel free to share your results good or bad.

Rethinking your views on skin and perfection ideals

In recent years, aging has forced me to begin to modify my perspective on my skin and re-think my views on what is truly important in life relative to my outward appearance. And the shift in perspective has resulted in healthier skin overall, achieved not by spending hundreds of dollars on skincare products every month hoping to transform my skin into the the blemish-free, pore free, line-free perfect skin that is preached to be ideal, but by accepting the reality of nature and science and thereby harboring realistic expectations and setting realistic goals.

not so perfect skin turmeric powder kale powder beet powder potato apple cider vinegar face mask treatment

I have never in my life had perfect skin. Not when I was a baby. Not when I was five, ten, fifteen, twenty, twenty-five, thirty–you get the gist. Yet somehow I have experienced no real harm to my life because of not having perfect skin. For sure, I might have managed to get signed with a modeling agency and make a name for myself and earn a nice living if I’d ever had perfect skin. So, in the way that having perfect skin can be an asset in the beauty industry if you’re someone interested in modeling or some other career where perfect skin is an asset, I suppose you’d be fortunate to have the kind of skin that defies nature and somehow manages to not go through the normal things that skin goes through because of being skin (especially when you have been alive for half a century). But other than the ways in which perfect skin can be an asset professionally, or can attract attention that boosts your ego and makes you feel good for knowing people admire you, there’s no harm to be suffered for having a few blemishes, and getting the occasional pimple and having a wart or two. A few moles on your face (provided they are non-cancerous), discoloration, unevenness of tone and all the other so-called flaws that we’re told should make us feel shame and embarrassment and make us spend and spend and spend on product after useless product trying to fix–these things haven’t yet killed anybody.

People are dying every day from all kinds of disease and from accidents and crimes and mental issues that make them choose to end their life. I can’t tell anybody how to live but I know how I want to live. And yes, it’s easy for me to talk. I’m an old lady now. Nobody cares. Well, truth be told, we’re out there judging people all up into their nineties nowadays, so nobody’s really exempt. We’re all getting subjected to cruel ridicule and judgement of our physical appearance. Image issues are tough to deal with at any age. You have to stay conscious and you have to be committed to your choice to remain conscious of rejecting the idea that you’re more worthy of note and more worthy of love and attention if you are beautiful, which includes having so-called perfect skin and forevermore looking like you’re twenty years old.

Love yourself and show love to yourself. Your skin is part of yourself. Love your skin and show love to your skin. When a thing is loved, it shows. And skin does not need to be “perfect” as in “flawless” for you to glow on the outside because of being lit by the love you show yourself in the way you care for your self both inside and out.

Singer songwriter Adelamonica AKA Avenue Sixty editor in chief. Writing as Monica for The Monica Archives. Writing has always been one of my passions. In fact, when I was a teenager, I used to tell people they should remember my name, because I was going to become a famous author. I used to live to write and write to live--not in the sense of writing for income but writing to combat depression and to feel a sense of purpose. I've written novels, poems, articles and essays that I tried unsuccessfully to get published over many years starting in my teens. When I discovered blogging several ages ago, I turned to that avenue as a means of doing what I love without having to worry about publishers and their rejection letters. Modeling is also something I have always enjoyed and something I wanted very badly to do as a teenager. So badly that I used to lie and tell people I was a model. I would carry around a large portfolio style photo album and claim it was my modeling portfolio. But, as with my writing, the people with the power to make my modeling dreams come true saw nothing in me that made them stop me in the streets of New York to offer me a modeling contract with their agency. So when I discovered the ability to photograph my own self (before cell phones and selfies) I took up a hobby of pretend modeling at home and that hobby has remained with me throughout my life as a form of self expression and self therapy. I ask that you kindly excuse my lack of worldliness and any instances where I demonstrate lack of tact or lack of knowledge and even lack of basic intelligence in my writing and posing. I'm just here trying to have a little fun doing the things that make me happy. I'm just an average human for whom writing and posing and singing and dancing and the other things I do are ways I express myself and keep myself going on this ever challenging journey of life. I hope you will find something even remotely useful or interesting in the things I share.

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