So I’ve decided to give this thing a shot again…
It’s been a while. I would end up writing a book if I tried to catch you up on my life so I’ll just jump right in as if you already know all the details of what’s been going on since December 9 2013. Today is Mother’s Day. I don’t have any children of my own. But for a brief period of time I had two step children almost(Nathan and Jessica). I’ve had a tradition every Mother’s Day since I lost them. I’d go to the cemetery where they and their dad are buried, and I’d have a cupcake with some white wine. But my therapist and I have decided it’s time that I let go of the family I almost, but never actually had.
Besides, it’s apparently bad cemetery etiquette to hold a celebration of any kind at a grave site.
Seems it’s inconsiderate of and disrespectful to all the other graves nearby and the people who might come to visit them. I don’t know. Frankly I don’t see the harm in someone having a little party at their loved one’s grave site. But some people feel really strongly that it violates the rules of cemetery etiquette.
Who knew there were rules about cemetery etiquette?
So I won’t be going to the cemetery today. And I won’t be acknowledging Mother’s Day as if I am, or ever was, a mother. Because like my therapist says, I wasn’t really Nathan and Jessica’s mother. Kenny and I hadn’t gotten married yet. And I’d only known them for a year before they died. And it just wasn’t enough of an involvement to justify holding on for the rest of my life. Instead of what I’ve done since Mother’s Day 2012, I will be taking my mother and my newly divorced sister out to dinner. I’m trying to repair my relationships with them. My therapist thinks it’s important.
What I plan to wear to dinner later: my BCBGMAXAZRIA pleated maxi dress with my Giuseppe Zanotti gold sandals and my gold Kenzo shoulder bag. You can shop my outfit at Nordstrom. Here are the items:
BCBGMAXAZRIA Meghan Pleated Georgette A-Line Gown

Dress Price: $298.00
Giuseppe Zanotti Coline Crystal Mesh Sandal
Shoe price: $1,395.00
KENZO ‘Raindrop’ Metallic Leather Shoulder Bag
Currently wearing: Olivia Von Halle silk pajamas ( haven’t gotten started for the day yet. It’s still early on a Sunday morning. I’ve got another couple of hours before I take my ritual Sunday morning luxury bath. These days I typically spend my Sunday morning hours reading style and fashion magazines online. And browsing the celebrity gossip blogs.
Shop my Olivia Von Halle silk pajamas

You can get these at Nordstrom as well. They come with a $500 price tag. The color is meadow green. They are made of 100% silk.
What I’m doing right now: I was just reading the Harper’s Bazaar exclusive interview with Kourtney Kardashian in which she answers their questions about what it’s like to keep up with 3 kids.

Speaking of Kourtney Kardashian, I had the most bizarre dream last night. I was friends with her sister Khloe and I was at Khloe’s house playing tennis with one of her other friends. In the dream I was me before I came into money. And I was having a hard time financially. After I finished playing tennis with her friend, Khloe called me over and asked me if I needed help. I was all embarrassed and prideful and tried to decline her offer to help me out, but she was insistent. So I agreed to let her help me out. And she deposited a large sum of money into my bank account. I wonder what’s the significance of that dream? Do I wish I was friends with Khloe Kardashian? She seems like the real and true loyal friend type. But I think she’d probably find me unbearably boring.
Well, that is it for now. Time to go prepare my bath in which I will be using among other things Jo Malone London red roses bath oil.
Happy Mother’s Day to all you lovely mothers out there.
Dress your most fabulous and take yourself out to dinner if your children can’t or won’t…
Maxine
Note: Maxine is not a real person and her musings are made up stories.