I am having breakfast as I sit at my computer typing. My breakfast is an all liquid breakfast. 3 recycled glass jars of varying sizes containing water, ginger and bay leaf tea, spinach kale and coconut milk blended drink.
This is my Day 1 breakfast. The tea is made by boiling fresh ginger and bay leaves in a pot of water for 30 minutes to an hour, depending upon how strong you want the tea. The green drink is made by blending spinach and kale in coconut milk.
Getting my mind and body in sync is going to be the most important aspect of this 30 day effort to start living a more fulfilling life.
The television is on in the living room. Roger Federer is playing Damir Džumhur in the 3rd round of the French Open. I have no idea who Damir Džumhur is; but I’ve been a Federer fan for a good few years. I’m rooting for him to win another grand slam before he retires. I just don’t want it to be the French Open because I want Rafael Nadal to win his 10th French Open title. But if Rafa gets ousted and Roger is still alive in the tournament I’ll definitely be rooting for Roger to win the French.
Of course both Roger and Rafa already have so much. They are hugely successful with multi-million dollar bank accounts to show for their life achievements. Their wife/girlfriend likely own one single item of clothing that costs 5 times more than the combined cost of everything in my closet. So I’d do well to invest my rooting energy into myself I think.
Last night I decided that I want to try again to enhance my life. Exactly what that means is not 100% clear to me right now. It seems like I’ve made plans to live a more fulfilling life about a million times starting since my teen years. I remember my 10th grade teacher Ms. Jenkins recommending a book about affirmations and creative visualization. I tried the affirmations and the creative visualization but it didn’t work. Maybe I didn’t try hard enough?
And another teacher, Mrs. Bradley, recommended L. Ron Hubbard’s book on Dianetics.
I’ve read so many self help books in my quest to live a happier more fulfilling life. I should know better than to think there’s anything I can do in the next 30 days to successfully pull off what I have not been able to pull off since I was a teenager. But I figure it’s still worth a try.
What does living a more fulfilling life mean to me?
That is what I’m trying to figure out for myself. I’m not even sure if I can say my life is not fulfilling. What does a fulfilling life look like? What does it feel like? Obviously there’s no single picture of what a fulfilling life looks like. Everybody’s life is different. Sometimes it feels like you’re supposed to live your life a certain way in order for people to think your life is worth something. But you’re not living for people. You’re living for yourself. And what matters isn’t how people perceive you and what they think of your life. It’s how you see yourself and how you feel about your life.
I guess I know that I don’t feel fulfilled in my life. What I don’t know is what will it take to make me feel fulfilled? Like many people I imagine that having money would change my life for the better. Say whatever you will but money gives you options. And it’s good to have options. But I don’t have money so it would defeat the purpose for me to go with the mindset that a fulfilling life is something you can only buy. I have to believe a fulfilling life can be created out of nothing. I have to believe that it’s possible to live a more fulfilling life even if my financial situation never changes.
But I first have to identify what things make me feel fulfilled in life. Or at the very least identify the things that make me feel like my life is lacking.
So that will be my homework for today. To make a list of the things that I believe would make me happy in life, even if they turn out not to make me happy at the end of it all. And to make a list of the things in my life with which I am not happy. Envision the life I think I want, and assess how my life currently holds up to that picture. And identify what it will take to create the life I envision. Also figure out if this is the life my heart truly desires or the life I think I want based on looking at and coveting other people’s lives.